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Try new Wheezambu, now with twice the minty freshness!

  • 20:10 yummy vietnamese food! #
  • 14:28 is so damn glad today is saturday #fb #
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So last night, my allergies kicked me good and stuffed up my nose like woah. After claritin didn't do jack, I mentioned to my husband that I was about to stick my nose in a jar of kimchee. He said, why? We still have some wasabi, won't that work better?

I am a dumbass. A tiny bit is a good thing, it does not mean that a larger quantity will also be a good thing! Thinking I'm so damn smart, I smeared some on a piece of bread and chomped down, introducing the defenseless roof of my mouth to pure Japanese hell.

Somewhere, the ghost of a bluefin tuna is laughing at me.

I wasn't quite as bad off as this poor son of a bitch, and thank any gods that are listening I've never been stupid (or drunk) enough to do something like snort wasabi because I would fuckin die. Seriously people. That's just nasty and masochistic as all hell.

What did happen is I took a bite, accidentally inhaled via mouth (since nose was stuffed up hence the whole problem) sucked wasabi spoor-vapor-acid into my lungs and proceeded to nearly cough myself unconscious. It was not intended, I was supposed to gently release the tender vapor towards my uncooperative sinuses. Instead, I coughed and choked for about five minutes, gasping for breath and sobbing like a little bitch.

Husband graciously came over to slap me on the back and inquire if I needed a Hiney-lick. I think I hacked up a chunk of my lung on his foot. It was painful, humiliating and I am grateful that I didn't shart myself and die of embarrassment. However...

Sinuses retreated in self-defense, packed their bags and I was clear for the rest of the evening.

Go figure.
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Spent the night in the hospital with Mara. Nothing like holding a newborn for hours to make you feel all gooshy inside. Baby's gorgeous, cute as a little bug. Mom's a little zonked on percocet today, but otherwise they are doing quite well. Little Violet Marie-Valentine is healthy and grunts/growls like a baby puppy.

Grant said all the dogs were pissed at him last night because I wasn't home. Kept giving him the evil eye and huffing. I've still got a lot to do around the house, but I'm fricking tired! Idiot husband stayed up too late last night and made himself late for work. This is what happens when they are left unsupervised.

*yawn*

Babies are awesome. Other peoples' babies, that is. I'd rather be an aunty.

Ack!

Apr. 28th, 2010 03:03 pm
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My husband's daughter, his ex-wife, and the ex-wife's current boyfriend all sent me friend requests on Facebook. O.o...I feel like I'm on that episode of SouthPark now. Too much pressure!

Home today, tomorrow and Friday! Needed a break from work like whoa. Need to clean my house too, is very yucky because we've been lazy lima beans.

[livejournal.com profile] nagaempress, I got your voicemail and can't wait for our "party" at the hospital.

Been planning vacation time from work, looks like 2nd half year is gonna be busy. Planning to go to DC in August, gonna TRY to go to Nan Desu Kan in Denver this year, that's in September but I'd have a free place to stay and a personal driver. :) And Denver has some awesome places to see besides the huge con. Not to mention one of the best damn ramen shops in the country. We'll have to see what work is like at the time. I have ass-loads of time off, but sometimes we're too busy for me to use it.

And in October, going to Dallas for husband's gaming con. At least they aren't doing it at the expensive boutique hotel this year, but a bigger place, so less cash and more stuff for me to do while he geeks out. It's close to Six Flags too...I wonder...Grant might say he's too old for rides but Wheez is all about 'em. I love riding roller coasters, eating junk food and getting sick off spinny rides. Only problem is that it's the weekend before Y-con so I'd only have two days home before I had to turn around and fly out again.

Told Grant he should come to Y-con, but he probably won't have time off from work and said "what part of hell no, do you not understand???" Poor guy, I'm traumatized him by bringing so much boi pRon in the house.

I should be done with the desire to travel by then, although Grant and I have discussed planning something around xmas time so we don't have to deal with the insanity of last year. My dad is usually in TX or Mexico during the winter, might have to make a run for the border. I do love my family, but I hate family holidays.
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Try new Wheezambu, now with twice the minty freshness!


  • 22:12 mt dew white out is pretty yum...reminds me of fresca #

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Note to self, do not take color quiz when feeling out of sorts. Scary accurate right now.

GET OUT OF MY BRAIN, BASTAAAARDSS!!!!

Ganked from [livejournal.com profile] amadoni

oh crap )

In other news, doing a lot writing right now. Listening to a lot of really awesome music too. Kinda burned out on my job, but survival mode is engaged. Out of hermit mode. Came out of hole a couple days ago, saw shadow, screamed and ran, called 911 because thought shadow was a stalker. Mother is going to Mesa for a week. I get to bbsit the Poodle. I want her to bring me a kachina doll, she'll probably find me a dreamcatcher made in Taiwan. Those make GREAT cat toys by the way, damned near impervious to claw damage. Stepdaughter having babyshower on Friday night...Friday night?? I'm bringing pampers and whiskey, hoping to avoid the shower and hang out with the psychotic Irish sperm donor instead. Went for Asian comfort food tonight, ate more steamed crawfish than any other non-Asian in the place. Five plates, shoulda brought home a couple heads for the cats to fight over. They had cold pickled squid and homemade kimchi. I'm gonna fart like an arthritic beagle tonight, ho'yeah. The bathroom at the restaurant was unheated, so cold I dared not seat myself. I did the shinobi hover-piss technique to save my girl-bits from frostbite. Squat with knees apart, rise up on toes, extend both arms for balance and find your happy place. Do not touch cold seat. If you're really good *and I am, believe it* you can do a paper summoning jutsu at the same time so you don't have to risk unfortunate trickle when you reach for the charmin.

I wanna go to mardi gras this year. I have no money so fail and no. *sniff*
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Gonna be -28 for a low tonight. Gonna be -40 for a windchill.

This shit is not funny!

If anyone wants me, I'll be in my igloo drinking cognac and eating penguin mcnuggets.
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Hot chocolate and Bailey's Caramel go extremely well together. Extremely well.

Almost better than...no, not better than sex, but it's up there!

*no pun intended ;)
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To refute the urban myth that I, one Wheez, cannot cook...I bring proof!

Tonight I made Pan-fried Noodles w/Hoisin Beef. )


Oh and just a few minutes ago I totally busted my next-door neighbor creeping on my bandwidth. We just recently replaced a modem and hadn't secured it yet, although we do secure our computers. Then I go in to put some pics in Grant's public drive and yo...WTF is JENNY? *in mah network, creeping on mah bandwidth* Huh. Neighbor's name is ...Jenny. So first I raided their public shared folders (just in case she haz porn) but all I found is that she plays Pharoh. *disappointed* Then Grant went in and told the modem to refuse to recognize that computer so if she tries again she'll see a strong signal and an unsecured source...but it won't let her in. BAWWWWW...for you. Naughty to steal bandwidth. Unless you're me. But only in public places. I'm not a ass-raeping pirate moocher!

*it is the moocher's duty to protect the store while the owner is away*
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Since [livejournal.com profile] beth_black's honesty meme reached it's comment limit when a lot of us were just getting into it...and didn't have the chance to say what we REALLY think...I'm going to copy it here. This entry is open and anon comments have been enabled for the duration.


++ Comment with your name
++ Link to it in your journal (aka PIMP YO PIMP)
++ This meme is almost 100% anon, unless you want to say something out in the open. it is up to you!
++ Say whatever you want to whoever you want, good or bad. What is an honesty meme without being completely honest (you know... nice, not so nice... )
++ There are ways to be honest without coming off like a little bitch, so please take that into account.

Spread the love...and anything else you have handy. Spam this Wheez.

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